Hey there! It's been a couple of weeks since my last post. And, for good reason, I think. I really wanted to be sure to make the most of the last weeks of summer with Little Guy and the rest of my family, before school started. So, while I visited with my sister in Florida, I promised myself I wouldn't indulge in the whole computer addiction I had been forming. I was spending way too much time on my computer. So, I wanted to prove to myself that I could do without. That I didn't have a problem. And, that this blogging thing was still something that was calling out to me. It enabled me to gain a bit of perspective. To stop being obsessed with my numbers. How many page views. How many followers. It was ridiculous, quite frankly. And, it deterred me from writing from my heart and keeping it fun for me. And, for you.
So much has happened in the last few weeks. A great visit with my sister. An earthquake at home, while I was on the road. Aftershocks. Hurricane Irene. Visitors taking refuge from Hurricane Irene. Sickness, and losing my voice. And, the most important. Little Guy started Kindergarten yesterday. And, he loves it. I was a complete basket case the day before. I broke down crying on three separate occasions. It didn't really surprise me. So, on this the first week of what begins a much more independent life for him, these are my wishes for him...
Dear Little Guy,
I love you and the little man that you have already become. I love your kind heart. I love your silly nature. The way you make faces that make me laugh. The way you turn every situation into an adventure. The fact that that you claim that your love to give and receive hugs and kisses is what makes you special. The fact that you deem God to be the most important "person" in your life.
Which leads me to my next train of thought. This is a rough week for Mommy. I love you so much. And, for the past five years, I have been the single biggest influence in your life. Of course, Daddy has been huge as well, but I have been so blessed to be able to stay home with you. To be your playmate. To help you develop a love of books. To discipline you as best as I can. To try to teach you to be kind to others. To consider others' feelings. To try to teach you to control your temper, which is eerily like mine. To be joyful, as God intended you to be.
But, now you will be spending the majority of your days with people I don't know. And, I'm wondering if five short years is enough time to instill in you what you need to deal with all the world will put in your path. Daddy and I will still, of course, continue to do our best, in the time that we have, to reinforce those things that we believe are so important. And trust that God will be with you when we are not. And that you will notice His presence, right there with you.
I've talked to you, Little Guy, about that voice in your head - and in your heart. You know, the one that speaks to you when no one else is around? That no one else but you can hear. The one that gently nudges you. And tells you when something isn't quite right. When you may want to make a better choice than the one right in front of you. The voice that God put in you, in all of us. To guide you. To help you. To let you know that you're not alone. The one that makes you stop before you do something you may regret. The one that makes you pause and look at Mommy (if she's close by) before you do it. Because you know there's probably a better choice. It's the one that tells you to share your toys with your buddies even when you really don't want to. It's the one that gives you the courage you need to speak that first word to a classmate who desperately wants to make a friend at school, just like you do.
I believe in you. And, you should believe in yourself. I am so excited to see how your life unfolds. The friends you make. The goals you achieve. The failures that teach you the most in life. More so than the triumphs.
You are a blessing from God and it amazes me that He has entrusted Daddy and me to take care of you. With all of our glaring imperfections. We do have one thing that I cannot deny, though. That qualifies us more than anything to be your parents. Huge hearts full of boundless love for you.
So, if I have any advice for you, my wonderful boy, it is to listen to that voice in your head. In your heart. Let it guide you. Don't ignore it. Acknowledge it. And, be brave. And, I will do my best to do the same.
All of my love.
And endless hugs and kisses,
This post was inspired by several posts by fellow bloggers who also wrote letters to their little ones who are starting school this year.